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How to use a bong

i jokingly put an item in my index saying "coming soon, a how-to-use-a-bong page". i was flooded with hits, and this page followed. At time of writing i'm number one for "how to use a bong" on www.google.com.

Use

Using a bong is fairly straightforward, but people always seem to have difficulty at first. The trick lies in getting the rate you inhale right.

1. Fill bong about two thirds full. Use chilled water if possible. Beware that using iced water increases the risk of pleurisy, the serious condition of water in the lungs.
2. Hold the bong in your none-dominant hand and cover the air hole with your thumb.
3. Note: It is polite not to put your mouth around the bong mouthpiece if you're sharing it, instead place your lips against it like you would a trumpet. This doesn't significantly decrease risk of catching infections from your fellow smokers; it is just as i said, more polite.
4. Now hold the lighter on its side so the flame passes horizontally over the banned substance.
5. Spark the lighter, and suck lightly so the flame licks downwards onto the substance.
   - Breathe too quickly and you will put out the flame and possibly suck in the water! Breathe too slowly and the flame will not touch the substance.
6. After a few seconds the substance should be burning. Remove the flame and keep sucking. The oxygen being drawn down should keep the fire going.
7. The gap above the water will soon fill with smoke. Breathe this in by taking your finger off the air hole on the side.

How to care for your bong

Glass bongs can be cleaned easily with pipe cleaners and Acetone. The easiest source of Acetone is most nail polish removers! Residues left from smoking are very difficult to remove with washing up liquid and many other cleaning products i've tried, but Acetone is a solvent for the residue.

Be sure to replace the metal gauze that goes in the burning section. This stops ash falling into the water reservoir thus helping to keep the bong clean. Gauze can be bought from shops such as Affleck's Palace in Manchester, UK.

If you have a glass bong, make sure the joints are greased before use, this protects them against scratching, and also provides an air tight seal.

Purchase

Available from cool shops all round the World. i bought mine from an Amsterdam market stall. It's of superb quality, comes with a case, and if treated well will last a lifetime. i strongly recommend Pyrex; it's strong, easy to clean, and has a scientific look about it.

Price?: You should be paying around 10 English pounds for a small bong, and anything upwards of 30 for larger models. Mine cost 15 euros.

Is THC water soluble?, how can a bong get me high ?

i've had someone email to say THC is water soluble and bongs don't really get you high. Is this akin to denying the existence of the female orgasm? There is conflicting information on the Internet, and i don't recall enough A-Level chemistry to figure it out myself.

i don't believe that THC is water-soluble, because of the massive high you can get off a bong. Maybe it is, but a large proportion still seems to get through. The benefits are that the bubbling through water cools the smoke and removes some of the nastier parts. But beware, that the fumes still contain some carcinogens.

The following was emailed to me by one Derrick Michael Thoma, who clearly know his stuff.

i randomly found your site on a Google image search, but being a chemistry nerd and stoner i could not help but answer the question of the solubility of THC in water.

Anyone with knowledge of general level chemistry can easily figure out that THC has extremely low solubility in water. Solubility has a lot to do with inter-molecular force (van der Wall's forces of attraction), and can be generally determined by the rule "like dissolves like." Water is a polar molecule held together largely by a molecular force known as hydrogen bonding, the most powerful inter-molecular force second to ion-dipole attraction. Hydrogen bonding describes the repeating bonding chain of Flourine, Nitrogen, or Oxygen atoms with Hydrogen atoms. The H₂O molecule easily rotates to accomplish this when bonding, forming very long chains of O-H-O-H etc bonds. Things are soluble in water because they likewise form hydrogen bonds, and those bonds are strong enough to break H₂O-H₂O bonds and suspend the solute molecule in H₂O solvent solution. However, the chemical composition of THC negates any kind of solubility it would have in water.

The composition of THC is C₂₁H₃₀O₂, and its structure is formed by long hydrocarbon chains. These chains consist of hydrogen atoms bonded to carbon atoms, and due to hydrogen's 1s1 valence shell arrangement, it cannot accept any new bonds, nor can it form a hydrogen bond with a carbon atom in the chain. There are 2 oxygen molecules, but neither are in proper position for a hydrogen bond. This leads to the chemical conclusion of why THC is not soluble in water. While it is polar and has significant London dispersion (inter-molecular forces), no hydrogen bonding exists and thus the "like dissolves like" rule cannot be fulfilled.

And, in case you are curious and still reading, there is a chemical reasons for why bongs fuck you up so much harder than pipes and joints. The first is the polar force of H₂O. When marijuana is burned, it decomposes into about 200 chemicals, and when passed through water, they decompose again into about 200 more chemicals, for a total of 400. This disassociation allows the molecules to bond much more easily with the inside of the lungs (due to their smaller size and willingness to bond) and thus more THC "sticks." Another reason has to due with gas laws and the effect of temperature on the smoke.

According to Charles' Law, volume/temperature= a constant, and when temperature decreases, so does volume. Therefore, when the smoke passes through water and over hopefully over ice, it condenses, thus fitting more chemicals into a smaller space (I can explain the reason for that too, but it's a different story). This means that more chemicals are inhaled.

And finally, the last gas law relating to a bong is the effect of temperature on gas solubility. Since molecular motion is slowed by the decrease in temperature, molecules have a much better chance at sticking to the walls of the lungs. I have asked myself the molecular reasons behind bongs more than once, and I hope this was of interest and answered once and for all the question of THC and its solubility in water.

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